Plans

When I was a little girl, my daddy worked for a civil engineering firm and he gifted me with one of his old briefcases full of various tools used at his job. Being the visual, artistic person I am, I would pull out my tools and map out my bedroom on a piece of paper. I would then make little shapes that would represent my bed, desk, dresser, etc. and I would cut the shapes out and begin to rearrange them in my little bedroom model until I came up with a new layout that suited my fancy and I would rearrange my room to reflect my design. 

If you had asked me when I started high school what I envisioned for my future, I would have told you I was planning to go to law school, graduate, get a job, be married sometime in my mid-20's, and have a kid or two in my 30's.

When my husband and I took a cruise many, many, many years ago, every morning I would wake up and scour the daily list of activities that were available to us and I would pick and choose just how we would spend our days at sea. No vacation of aimless leisure for me! Not when there was an art auction or dance class or karaoke hour available!

This week while I was enjoying a girls day out with one of my friends, I purchased a brand new planner for 2017. It's completely adorable, with decorative month dividers and birthday lists, and the pages are fresh and clean waiting for me to begin to chart out all the birthdays and to-do's that will  fill my days and weeks and months. I'll write in what I know is on our calendar at the moment, but there's so much left that is unknown to me right now.

I write all of this to say, I tend to like planning. I enjoy playing with possibilities and picking a path to take. Having things on my calendar gives me a focus to aim towards, as well as an excitement over what's coming up. And let's be honest, planning gives me a certain sense of security that I am in control of how my days unfold. 

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:11-13

If you had told me when I was an exhausted 29- year-old mother of 3, having been up all night with my newborn daughter, that there was a 6-month baby girl that needed a home, I would have declared that tragic, but I wouldn't have volunteered to be her mother. 

Or if you informed me on a night in December of 2012, having just watched my 16-year-old become a first time dad, that a baby boy would be born two months later that I would chase after to make my own child, I would have thought you were suggesting the absurd. Add an additional four children to that one bringing us to a family of 10, well, that's just crazy. 

But here we are in 2017 and my plans? Well, in the line-up of kids we hope to have in our home before the end of the year, I will indeed have 2 girls that are only 6 months apart in age and a son who will be 2 months younger than my granddaughter. Plans? Yeah, I've learned to become a little more flexible with that word...

You know, I'll see Jeremiah 29:11 on everything from framed artwork to coffee cups to pillows come May. Graduation season will be upon us, and there seems to be a certain comfort that's found in standing on the edge of an unknown future, knowing that God has plans for you. And, He does. But can I just say one thing I've discovered? HE KNOWS the plans HE has for you.

And guess what?

They may look nothing like any plan you've written on a calendar page. They may not be the ones you penned in your journal. They may be plans you haven't even thought were in the realm of possible for your life. And when they come into focus, when the nudges on your heart begin, when that voice keeps calling out to you again and again, and your mind wants to argue all the reasons why it's impossible, just say "yes."  

Even when they don't feel like plans for your welfare. And sometimes, well they just won't. You'll be in the uncomfortable land of desperation and dependence. When the money is scarce and the naysayers put in their opinions and you feel overwhelmed, keep moving through that Jeremiah passage: call upon, pray to, seek God with all your heart. 

People plans? Well, they've made for some pretty pictures. But, God plans? They're a beautiful, amazing testimony to the One who put the world in motion in the first place.  

To update: We continue to work on expanding our house to be able to house a family with 7 kids at home. We finally finished our home study and psychiatric evaluation, and have submitted our immigration paperwork to the US for approval to bring 5 children home. Once we get that, we'll be sending our dossier to Costa Rica. I have resigned from working outside the home and will start 2017 by focusing on preparing our house for our expanding family. God has been abundant in His blessings of  financial help, furniture and clothing donations, and people who've given of their time to help with our housing project. We could not, I repeat, we COULD NOT have gotten this far without the love and support of those around us. May each of you have a blessed 2017!