The Stumbling Block
"But the Lord is faithful, and He will strengthen and protect you from the evil one." 2 Thessalonians 3:3
Confessional time, friends - Mike and I, we have reached a place of weariness and discouragement. We have come upon a stumbling block in our path, and right now, I think we're just sitting on the ground with bruised knees from the fall and bloody scraped palms from trying to catch ourselves. We didn't even see it coming. If you could go back just one week in our lives, you would find two people who were hopeful that this week would have brought a new opportunity, a hopeful outcome, a change for the better.
I had hopes that maybe this love I have for helping the fatherless in this world would be allowed to take root in my work life as well, that maybe I could take a step away from business and a turn towards a deeper ministry. It was right there on my horizon one day, and I kept my eyes on it expectedly, waiting patiently for my time, but it seems that was merely a mirage, for in the next moment it was gone. Door shut. Avenue Closed.
And if you've ever been here, then you'll understand the emotions that followed - disappointment, questioning, sadness, self-pity, hurt, grouchiness. I've had them all, and that type of roller coaster ride in 48 short hours is exhausting.
Mike has had the burden of watching this all play out without being able to change anything. He loves me, he's spoke encouraging words and wrapped me up in hugs, but really he can only bandage the wounds, he can't speed up the healing. It's not surprising that my stumbling block snagged his toe as well. Misery loves company, and even he has had moments of "Why do we keep at this? We thought we were being obedient and yet, we seem stuck right where we started with nothing to show."
I have said to more than one of my friends this week, "I'm done." I feel like I have been trying to wade through a river against the flow in order to make progress, and so, I throw my hands up to the sky and say, "So be it."
But here's the thing, even in my moment of distress, even though I've cried more than a few tears, some that came unwelcome at 3 in the morning, even then, God gifted us with friends who are praying for us. They don't throw a, "Suck it up" my way, but give me room for my sadness and try to send a kind word or two throughout my day.
This morning, I was working on my Bible study, and I was re-reading for the third time how Nehemiah was just trying to finish the wall, but one enemy after the other was trying varied plans to try and stop him. One by one, he'd deal with their disruptions, but then he went right back to the task at hand, and brick by brick, in a miraculous, only God could do it time-frame, the wall was built.
It was this study that had me reading the verse from 2 Thessalonians that I quoted above. How appropriate that I came upon these verses today. Not last week when I thought they wouldn't apply to me, not two weeks from now when my feelings had enough time to turn into a seed of bitterness in my heart. No, when the grief is fresh and I'm still aching, here's what God had to say.
So, Mike and I, we're a little walking wounded right now. I know it is right to keep going to what we feel God has called us to, but our pace is a little slower this week. So, maybe you're limping alongside us and can share a little bit of understanding, and maybe you're running hard and free and can lift us in prayer that we can get going again. Honestly, I'm thankful for either.
Confessional time, friends - Mike and I, we have reached a place of weariness and discouragement. We have come upon a stumbling block in our path, and right now, I think we're just sitting on the ground with bruised knees from the fall and bloody scraped palms from trying to catch ourselves. We didn't even see it coming. If you could go back just one week in our lives, you would find two people who were hopeful that this week would have brought a new opportunity, a hopeful outcome, a change for the better.
I had hopes that maybe this love I have for helping the fatherless in this world would be allowed to take root in my work life as well, that maybe I could take a step away from business and a turn towards a deeper ministry. It was right there on my horizon one day, and I kept my eyes on it expectedly, waiting patiently for my time, but it seems that was merely a mirage, for in the next moment it was gone. Door shut. Avenue Closed.
And if you've ever been here, then you'll understand the emotions that followed - disappointment, questioning, sadness, self-pity, hurt, grouchiness. I've had them all, and that type of roller coaster ride in 48 short hours is exhausting.
Mike has had the burden of watching this all play out without being able to change anything. He loves me, he's spoke encouraging words and wrapped me up in hugs, but really he can only bandage the wounds, he can't speed up the healing. It's not surprising that my stumbling block snagged his toe as well. Misery loves company, and even he has had moments of "Why do we keep at this? We thought we were being obedient and yet, we seem stuck right where we started with nothing to show."
I have said to more than one of my friends this week, "I'm done." I feel like I have been trying to wade through a river against the flow in order to make progress, and so, I throw my hands up to the sky and say, "So be it."
But here's the thing, even in my moment of distress, even though I've cried more than a few tears, some that came unwelcome at 3 in the morning, even then, God gifted us with friends who are praying for us. They don't throw a, "Suck it up" my way, but give me room for my sadness and try to send a kind word or two throughout my day.
This morning, I was working on my Bible study, and I was re-reading for the third time how Nehemiah was just trying to finish the wall, but one enemy after the other was trying varied plans to try and stop him. One by one, he'd deal with their disruptions, but then he went right back to the task at hand, and brick by brick, in a miraculous, only God could do it time-frame, the wall was built.
It was this study that had me reading the verse from 2 Thessalonians that I quoted above. How appropriate that I came upon these verses today. Not last week when I thought they wouldn't apply to me, not two weeks from now when my feelings had enough time to turn into a seed of bitterness in my heart. No, when the grief is fresh and I'm still aching, here's what God had to say.
So, Mike and I, we're a little walking wounded right now. I know it is right to keep going to what we feel God has called us to, but our pace is a little slower this week. So, maybe you're limping alongside us and can share a little bit of understanding, and maybe you're running hard and free and can lift us in prayer that we can get going again. Honestly, I'm thankful for either.
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